Wow, it appears that I’ve been nominated for a Plummy (originally at plummies.plumofthemonth.com) – thank you Oz (or whoever’s behind the curtain). There are some dang fun links on the ballot too, like this (boygirlparty) and this (art school dropout). Oh, and they’re all craft-related — fun stuff — voting ends August 31st.
Now, that’s how you whip up a happy birthday! Thanks for the tidal wave of goofy jokes – my dumb chicken joke seems extra dumb now. Not only did I laugh, but I also giggled, gasped and guffawed. And, your outpouring of jokes had me in such a fabulous mood all day! What love – thank you!
As far as the laughs go, I don’t think I’ll look at the numbers 0 and 8 in the same way again. And, I wish that I had a Grandmother Pizza. Picking a winner was harder than ever expected. In fact, I brought the jokes with me to my birthday dinner for input (you can see the manuscript beneath my right arm, below). Pink Fluff, Magic Beer, and The Decoy won rave reviews, as well as Darth Vader Party Pooper and 9, 8, 7, 6… And, that was only the first half of what came in!
So, coming from a gal who has her husband order food for her (indecisive – too many choices!), I’d like to present the first place ribbon to Caroline (Dollie Daydream) for:
Q: Why did the skeleton burp in church?
A: Because he didn’t have the guts to fart.
My mother is still trying to decide if she could get away with telling this one at church. Caroline will have her pick of the pincushions and this fabulous ribbon to flaunt around town – wear it with pride!
As for the birthday list, mission accomplished! (Except for the fact that wish #1 was so well-met that it prevented postponed wish #2.) As a bonus, Isaac made me breakfast lunch. Then, not long after, I had a fantastic dinner with my loved ones (and your menagerie of jokes), glutting myself on Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake, with White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle Cheesecake as my palette cleanser – whoa! Then, Isaac and I snuck off to the bookstore, followed by The Devil Wears Prada, while my mother watched the kids. An ideal day.
(Yes, wish #4 was squeezed in as well – but it will require its own future post.)
Finally, you have to see the birthday card from my sister, Julia. She bought it for me almost a decade ago, finding it irresistibly perfect. She then stashed it away for my next birthday and forgot about it every year since. I can’t have changed too much over the years, because this card is still as Heathery as they come. In fact, lock me in a room with nothing to do, for long enough, and I’ll knit myself a scarf from my own hair – or perhaps a hammer and a chisel to escape with.
Tomorrow’s my birthday – the best day of the year. And this year, for my birthday, my list is rather simple:
• Sleep in
• Visit my favorite antique store
• Get pedicure Thanks Merris!
• Buy some strange hoo-ha on eBay
• Eat something sinfully chocolate
• and… laugh!
I’m off to a good start today with that pedicure, thanks to my SIL, Merris. Seeing as I’m generally a short-nails, no-polish kind of gal, this was my first pedicure ever! So, in honor of my first pedicure ever, I went all-out and authorized a celebratory sprig of flowers to bedeck my toes – white flowers, with red crystal centers. Hours later, I’m still in debate over whether toe-flowers are ‘me’ or not – they sure are cute – toe wiggle – perhaps too cute? – toe wiggle. And the lotion they used! I’m not a lotion kind of gal either, but I’d sure like to get my hands (or feet) on some of that stuff!
As for the other items on the list, they’re all in the works. In fact, I have big plans for that last one – the laugh – and, I’m counting on you. OK, cut the prologue – JOKE CONTEST – right here, right now! Get me with your favorite joke or shaggy-dog story, and win your pick of these pears!
Rule #1: Nothing dirty or vulgar
Rule #2: No swearing (“¿!#*?!#” is fine)
Rule #3: No offense if I edit your joke for not following the rules
Tip: I like dumb jokes too. One of my all-time favorites is:
Q: “Why DIDN’T the chicken cross the road?”
A: “Because he was a chicken!”
Come on, humor me – literally. Oh please? It’s my birthday!
I’ll announce the winner sometime on Sunday Monday. (This is way too much fun!)
Sitting still can be frustrating. I’m not any good at it. So, when we rent a movie or go to my parents’ house for dinner, I’m always hunting around my studio at the last minute for some grab-n-go project I can fiddle with — ironically, I like to stay busy to relax. But worse, when it’s time to relax, I’m usually too tired to think up a project, make the preliminary design decisions, and pack up the necessary supplies I’Il need at the park, at the library, or on the couch. (Usually, I end up with my trusty sketchbook and a mechanical pencil — or skip relaxing all together.)
Enter the Yo-Yo-Flower. Aren’t these fun? And, so simple to make! On Saturday, I bought some coasters at an antique store in St. Louis, where the owners were busy making these frillies to mark time through the hot summer. (I should have checked the name of the store — I thought it would be on the receipt, but no.) My thoughts: “Nifty flowers — I love yo-yos –I was just thinking about yo-yo flowers — cool — I could make these in front of the t.v. — heck, my son could make these — yes — when I get home, I’ll pack a little tin of fabric scraps and vintage buttons, with a needle and a spool of thread, to keep on hand as my emergency pacifier — oh, and wire!”
Well, to sum things up rather abruptly, I found myself some simple relief for a small aggravation — a perfect thing to share. So, I pass this happy hoo-ha along to the other manic makers out there. I’m predicting that Yo-Yo Flowers will be the next wave of vedge-crafting — at the Bailey’s, at least.
I admit things have gotten a bit cute around here lately. And the boat’s not turning around just yet. At least, not until I brag about this little goat. Julia found him for sale at my favorite discount motherload, Last Chance. They sell off goodies from major department stores for near-nothing. He’s got the funniest little goat body and he’s cashmere! All mine All Charlotte’s for only $2 (with a $199 Saks price tag still attached – yikes!) Ok, so what’s the big whoop? Nothing really, just a fun bargain brag and a commemorative photo before Mr. Goat’s covered with graffiti and cheez-its, that’s all.
Add to the snobby goat, these outrageous pink patent shoe-boos and I’ve had some fun shopping this month! (The green ones in the background are a confession – it’s true, I’m weak. I couldn’t decide between pink patent and green suede, so I bought both)
This is the most ridiculous apron — I just love it! The embroidery is all chunky and gawky and the sewing is worse (though you can’t tell from the photos, Miss Ta-Da and the pleats above her are a couple of inches off from where they’re supposed to be). But, the kicker, of course, is her flip-up skirt with matching panties! She had to be mine.
What a hoot! You guys left the funniest comments on Turkey for a Straw. Thanks for the laughs! We’re going camping tonight. This is the third effort to go this month and we’re not letting anything stand in our way. It’s not the best timing for me though — I have a lot on my plate this week. But, I’m not up for being the wrench this go round. So, off I go with a smile. (First time taking baby Charlotte too – yikes!)
On a different note, Sally (Shim and Sons blog, 2006) made the most fabulous headbands this week! And they’re for her adorable little boys. Finally, a “boy band” worthy of accolades! (Has anyone ever seen Conan O’Brien’s spoof on boy bands? – I swear, it’s the most hilarious bit ever!) Anyway, you should go take a peek at her beautiful photographs and use of color. She always does such a classy job!
Lastly, the baby shoe pattern is done. I still have to make a couple of sample pair to photograph. After that, I’ve got to learn more about bandwidth and how to avoid going way over my allotment, so my site’s ready for a flood of downloads. Once that’s all sorted out, I’ll get the pattern uploaded. Any suggestions?
OK, time to pack, the s’mores are calling. ☺
Good Times – serves 2
Ingredients:
1 heaping bag of vintage micro-scraps
1 good friend or loved one
A pinch of beads
A dash of ribbon
A sprinkle of buttons
1-2 hours of silliness
The result? Two funky portraits of me 🙂
My mother in law, Elinor, envisioned me with pink hair and a purple plaid baby in my belly. The fabulous coat shows my vavoom, don’t you think? In my version I have pigtails, a duck knee and a tricky puff-sleeve. Good times.
Insider information for all of you Portland Oregonians, Elinor’s teaching a class on flat dolls with 5 other wacky ladies (all bigtime professional doll designers) over at Fabric Depot in August. Full day, SIX patterns and only $40.
I love straws. I do. I love them enough to grab a stack, tie a bow around them and use them as the subject of my first lesson on my husband’s fancy, enormous and heavy camera. That being said, this temporary focus on straws forced me to analyze my affection:
• Straws are empathetic. Your drink can be mighty-crazy cold and a straw will deliver it right past your sensitive teeth.
• Straws are heroic. A straw will save you from a block of ice barreling toward you as you tilt your head back to drink. This is especially obnoxious when the ice has managed to form a virtual iceburg, the shape of your glass. Your beverage may then splatter from the thrust of the dislodged ice and you’ve gotta change your shirt. Not if you use a straw!
• Straws and lipstick get along.
• No orange mustaches.
• Straws are great for driving. With no head tilting, you can keep your eyes on the road.
• Good for smiles. It’s actually better for your teeth, when enjoying a sugary drink, to use a straw.
• You can match your straw to your mood. It’s like saying, “That’s right, I’m feeling pink today!” Children instinctively understand this.
• Straws are cheap fun. (I get my fix at Ikea, they sell boxes of 200 straws for $1, in funky color combos)
• Straws like to party. Display an array of cute, coordinated straws at a baby shower or birthday and it’s inexpensive table décor. Functional too.
• Straws like to dance. Stir your drink to “In the Good Ol’ Summertime,” while kickin’ it on the hammock. Straws like that.
• Straws reduce stress. A straw can help you keep track of your glass. Everyone gets a different color — easy living.
• And, face it, slurping is fun!
I’m not alone. My sister, Julia, loves straws too. When she serves me a drink, it’s always, “And what color straw would you like?” She keeps a serious stash of options. (What’s that all about? It’s not like straws were a big thing at our house.) So, after much analysis and self-reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that straws are just great. I’m convinced that there are folks all around the world like my sister and me, who anonymously keep an ample supply of straws on hand for all of the glorious reasons above. You should too – go get yourself some! Straws are neat.
For a good, old-fashion “Turkey in the Straw” sing-a-long, click here.
I came across this box of pencils at my antique store. I HAD to have it. I carried it around with me for an hour, flipping it over and over again to admire the illustrations. I love the colors and the energy.
I was with my mom. We headed to the antique store on a lark, having to purchase a $10 umbrella stroller on the way for Charlotte – no lack of wheels would interfere with our fun. And fun it was. We didn’t adopt many items, but the wandering conversation that accompanies such a hunt is a treasure on its own. Thanks mom, let’s do it again!
